Do I get points for cool or am I just frrigid I swear I feel I swear I feel I'm just trying to deal

I can't make you sing but let me show you

"The establishment of the fine arts and their division into categories go back to a time that differed radically from ours and to people whose power over things and circumstances was minute in comparison with our own..."

Paul Valéry, Pièces sur l'art

i am unable to run from my problems but have tried to hide from them with 70 hour work weeks and forget about them over drinks. Time to get the fuck over it and make something.

it's just that the only thing that i can feel for him is a memory, the shadow in flickering light of love or the polaroid of my heart all torn up... and as much as i may try to ignore these things i seem to have learnt nostalgia from one of it's masters and have turned it into waking nightmares, 7 am anger, and the punctuation of an afternoon in which everything-is-okay-as-long-as-i'm-me-and-you're-not-you with some uncalled-for moment of genuine tenderness. I regret it all immediately.

it's under my skin can i wash it off can i dig it out can i taste just like me because i want to just be.

101

does this all seem too private to be commented upon? should i include more socio-political discourse?

I have a sliver of metal in mypinke finger and i can't get it out. Lost potential for metaphor.

I am simplifying.

I want to be monochromatic.

I want to sleep more and want less, and have more nights spent sleepless in anticipation.

I craved novelty and the old spun me around until my sense of direction failed me...

I am drawing a map.

understanding things

18-02-2009

incapable, imparfait.

je m'excuse, it's all your fault.

nihilism to fill your bed

happiness will break your heart

so don't let it go to your head, this sinking high, a fleeting rush

do you not yearn, at all?